What If?

Only one week. Just one week until we go back to Ecuador.

I’m excited. I’m nervous.

I think I know people down there, I think I have friends, and I think there are people who I will become friends with.

But…

And doubt creeps in.

What if… what if I was wrong?

What if I was wrong about the jungle? What if I wasn’t really seeing how things were, and even if I was, what if they’ve changed?

Mom and Dad won’t be teaching at Antioch Academy, the school we were at last year. We won’t be on the school campus.

We’ll be in the village, really in it. In a different house. We don’t even know which one yet.

We’re going to be doing new ministries. We’re going to be reaching out to the community in some of the same ways, but many, many new ways as well.

We’re going to be meeting and working with new people, doing new things.

My head reels with so many different questions. And yet, it still feels like there are no answers.

With some things, I guess you never know until you’re in the middle of them. Like, right there.

I don’t really want to get off the bus and have no where to go.

Or greet someone I remember who then asks who I am.

Or find out that someone who we’ve been talking to about Jesus, someone who really seemed like they wanted to know more, is gone.

But, like a good friend once told me, He’s just testing my faith.

And I guess He is.

I won’t have all the answers to my questions as soon as I get there.

I won’t know what this next year on the Field holds.

But God does. And that’s good enough for me.